Wreckage To Hope

With any storm in life, big or small, you need a buffer......tricks to help keep as much normalcy as possible. For example, Rob [my husband ] and I always have a date day every week, sometimes two. Obviously we can't do that right now, so we improvise and have it at home. Date night at home consists of getting our favorite takeout, lighting some candles, and watching a movie. There's been a few different things we've done, you just have to find what works for you. You have to keep being intentional about doing the things that bring enjoyment to your life and marriage. You don't quit having fun just because life isn't " just so." Intentionality  is part of the glue that holds things together, and being able to find the silver lining helps keep you sane. Plain and simple, don't get devoured by your demise. Our weekly trips to Indy had some fun added in, such as stopping at a coffee shop, getting lunch together, etc. I would also have Rob just drop me off...

That saying you often see on Facebook or a t-shirt, " It's fine, I'm fine, everything is fine," I find very appropriate for today lol! Thankfully I have practiced the 'pause' method and use it as needed. Sometimes you just have to take a step back, recollect yourself, and move forward. If you don't, more often than not, you're going to stay in that frazzled state and you might as well kiss productivity goodbye lol!  One of the things I am referring to is that virtual appointment I was supposed to have today which didn't happen because my phone wouldn't cooperate. Because everything, and I mean everything has been so complicated, when I have days where everything I try to do is, it doesn't take much to get me mad and frustrated. When you don't feel good and are overly emotional as a result of feeling like poo, it's bound to happen. Most of the time, I can handle it, but have my days. I've gotten some extremely valuable tools from...

 I'm a little frustrated and emotional today. I don't know what bug is going around, but I have an ear infection, a migraine, and a virus on top of what I am already dealing with. I feel like a beat up dishrag. Doing all the things to kick it, so may it be short lived and gone before Friday's Colonoscopy! I was at the Doctor's office for a couple of hours, I have a virtual appointment at 2:00 pm tomorrow with my Pelvic Pain Specialist, then we go to Indy on Friday for my other unpleasantries. The majority of my Specialists are in Indy due to the complexity of my issues. Having said all of that, I need to rest and we'll pick up where we left off tomorrow. ;) I will probably get it posted in the morning or midday. I finally got my medical bracelet today 😁. Any appendage I get stuck with ( as you can see from previous pictures) is going to have bling or some kind of cute to it! For me, it makes those things less depressing. If I didn't have to change out my cathet...

 Hi Friends! I honestly didn't know if I was going to be able to post anything due to the uncertainty about what all was going to transpire today. I'm here, after a long day in the ER. I barely escaped the ER yesterday and I must say, it's unnerving and exhausting feeling like a ticking time bomb never knowing what each day will hold, if I'll have to go to the hospital, etc.!!! The Doctor I had and nurse were both phenomenal and gave me everything I needed, moving quickly to get my pain and nausea under control. I had blockage issues today with my catheter and urine was leaking around my Urethra. I could tell there was blockage and I was having some renal reflux issues. When that happens, the pain is a 9-10 on the pain scale they use from 1-10. When urine is trying to pass, it hurts really bad up my back, and my right kidney and ureter were a hot mess. Am okay now and home resting. Okay, onward!!! Going back first to January of this year another "storm" was br...

 There are so many ripple effects that come from trauma [ mentally, physically, and emotionally ]. The aftermath of someone else's doing and even your own choices can be ugly and I have had plenty of ugly. If you were wondering, these posts aren't always easy to write, but I can see areas where I thought I had healed and I am not completely yet, even after years of working on myself and therapy. Now mind you, I haven't ever had a problem talking about it, except at first of course. I guess some wounds are so deep that it takes something like this to bring out what still remains. Being angry and resentful because you even have to deal with it does no one any good and only stalls your healing. I mentioned before that I am going through a health battle right now and I have found that in my darkest moments come my biggest revelations and turning points. Bitter sweet, that's all I have to say about that. I ended up grabbing hold of the thing I used to hate.....the thing that...